The Mechanical Contrivium...


I have been trawling around some random generators on the web to see if they could come up with anything that would produce at least a smirk. The best one so far is the Mechanical Contrivium which generates very little known facts about some of our favourite persons and things. So... I popped a few names in to see what came up...

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Hugh Despenser the younger!

  1. The condom - originally made from Hugh Despenser the younger - was invented in the early 1500s.
  2. Hugh Despenser the younger invented the wheel in the fourth millennium BC.
  3. The only Englishman to become Hugh Despenser the younger was Nicholas Breakspear, who was Hugh Despenser the younger from 1154 to 1159.
  4. Devoid of his cells and proteins, Hugh Despenser the younger has the same chemical makeup as sea water!
  5. Hugh Despenser the younger can use only about ten percent of his brain.
  6. If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and Hugh Despenser the younger would be as small as a pea!
  7. Hugh Despenser the younger can sleep with one eye open.
  8. The fingerprints of Hugh Despenser the younger are virtually indistinguishable from those of humans, so much so that they could be confused at a crime scene!
  9. You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching Hugh Despenser the younger.
  10. Hugh Despenser the younger kept at the window will keep vampires at bay.
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Ten Top Trivia Tips about Edward II!

  1. The horns of Edward II are made entirely from hair!
  2. Over 2000 people have now climbed Edward II, with roughly ten percent dying on the way down.
  3. Only 55 percent of Americans know that the sun is made of Edward II!
  4. The International Space Station weighs about 500 tons and is the same size as Edward II.
  5. Edward II can eat up to four kilograms of insects in a single night.
  6. It is impossible to fold Edward II more than seven times.
  7. If you kiss Edward II for one minute you will burn six or seven calories.
  8. Over 46,000 pieces of Edward II float on every square mile of ocean.
  9. If you keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn into Edward II!
  10. Edinburgh imports three thousand kilograms of Edward II every year!
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I dedicate No. 7 on this list to Kathryn!

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Roger Damory!

  1. Roger Damory was the first Tsar of Russia!
  2. People used to believe that dressing their male children as Roger Damory would protect them from evil spirits.
  3. You would have to dig through four thousand kilometres of Roger Damory to reach the earth's core.
  4. Roger Damory was first discovered by Alexander the Great in India, and introduced to Europe on his return!
  5. The National Heart Foundation recommends eating Roger Damory at least three times a week.
  6. Roger Damory can usually be found in nests built in the webs of large spiders.
  7. Over 46,000 pieces of Roger Damory float on every square mile of ocean.
  8. Roger Damory is physically incapable of sticking his tongue out.
  9. It's bad luck for a flag to touch Roger Damory!
  10. The Vikings believed that the Northern lights were caused by Roger Damory as he rode out to collect warriors slain in battle!
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Posted by Lady D. Monday, 10 November 2008 at 10:45